


My Biggest Responsibility

by QxzVIl



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Daddy!Derek, Different Points of View, Dirty Talk, F/M, Feels, Gen, Grandpa!Papa Stilinski, House Buying, How do you tag these things?, M/M, Mpreg, Phone Sex, Stiles and his dad rebuilding their trust in one another, bottom!Derek, but still some angst, characters with a "minor" next to it aren't that important in this fic, characters with a "past" next to it are no longer in the story, daddy!stiles, lol, maybe a part two?, rebuilding relationships, some cute now, uh
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-04-29
Updated: 2013-08-18
Packaged: 2017-12-09 21:18:48
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 6
Words: 15,682
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/778095
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/QxzVIl/pseuds/QxzVIl
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Derek's pack is in a disarray after the alpha pack comes into town. After the mess they leave is done and Stiles says he's leaving, Derek can't just let Stiles leave him. What ensues will result in one of the craziest years either of them have experienced.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> But seriously, HOW DO YOU TAG? I hope they made sense...
> 
> Anyways, hi! This is my first fic on this account e.e (So please bare with me if the tags or anything else is wrong or incorrect, because I'm learning! I'll get it (Hopefully) after a few times. )
> 
> I'm posting this also on Fanfiction.net, and I'm under the same name on there (QxzVIl) in case you want to read my other stuff. So, if you're there, then hey; feel free to be totally cool and leave a comment or something :P
> 
> I don't own teen wolf (thank you, Jeff Davis!) nor do i own the characters (again, thanks!) so don't throw me in copyright jail; I WOULDN'T LAST ONE NIGHT IN THERE, JIMMY! *sobs*
> 
> Also, this is my first time writing Bottom!Derek (and it's his first time doing it also) so, in a way, I guess we're BOTH virgins! *Cackles like a witch high off of Toads Warts*)

I never expected to stay in Beacon Hills after High School, and especially in light of everything that’s happened.

Not after the Alpha Pack came into town, nearly destroying whatever fragile little bond or whatever it was that we all had to each other. How they tested us, made us doubt that our Alpha was even deserving of the power he had. Sure, they all perished, but the words lingered long after.

It was when everyone caved in on themselves, and each other, and pack meetings became nonexistent for a while. How I always worried whether or not they were okay, or if they had disappeared, or even just up and left us entirely _._ The odd text here and there I would send them would come back and my worry and doubts would get washed away.

And especially not after both me _and_ my dad were left in the hospital, result of the aftermath that was written all over our bodies. Seeing his body covered in bruises, now yellowing after a few days; cuts that would leave scars after they healed up; the pained expression he gets when he moves even a fraction of an inch; and the amount of hurt and betrayal that flashes across his face when our eyes meet across the way.

Yeah. That was definitely what hurt the most when we were recuperating.

After they released us from the hospital, I could tell he no longer trusted me; I mean, how could you trust someone who asked for your help, and left you in that state? I sure wouldn’t, and I’m not mad at it. Okay, maybe a little, but it’s nothing I can’t handle.

 It was just disappointing that I couldn’t give him the news that I’d been accepted to colleges in New York.

* * *

The letters all came with the last few months of senior year. In March, it was one from Stanford and Harvard. And in April, it was NYU, Cornell and Syracuse. I had no real idea what I wanted to do, but my Counselor told me to apply to a wide range of colleges that all pretty much offered similar things. It was smart, but that still left me not knowing.

For now, School moved on like normal, more or less the same. Prom was coming up at the beginning of May, but I had nobody to go with, and no real motivation to rent a tux anyways. I’d probably be gone soon anyways, so it didn’t make sense to go. After that, graduation announcements had been sent out by almost everyone, plans were made for the summer by the lower classmen, college was thrown around by the juniors and end of school jitters hit a few seniors hardcore. Luckily I wasn’t one of them.

Scott caught up with me by my locker, worry clearly written on his features. He never really did have a good poker face, if I’m being completely honest. “You alright, dude? You seem kind of…” The word hung in the silence, not really sure of what it wanted to become.

My poker face was much better, and I nodded convincingly. “Yeah, I’m fine. Just a little stressed with finals and all that.” I threw in a small smile as well, because this was not a lie; finals were killers for everyone, the seniors mostly. I just hoped I would make it through the last month, as well as packing.

He bought it, graciously, swallowing. “Alright. Just wanted to let you know that there’s something Derek wants to talk to all of us about, so we’re meeting tonight.” The bell rang, and he cursed for good reason; his next class was English, and he was about to fail it if he missed any more days of it. “Shit, I gotta go! I’ll text you the details after school!” And he was gone.

I exhaled a breath I hadn’t known I was holding. Would I really be okay with seeing everyone again? Hell, I don’t know how any of us are going to react tonight; Jackson was gone, so was Boyd, as was Allison. Well, not so much she was _gone_ , just staying distant from everyone. Derek especially. I slammed my locker shut and walked off, putting the expected pack meeting far in the back of my head.

* * *

I did in fact get a message from Scott, surprised because he usually forgets and blows me off for Allison. But now that his head is actually out of her ass-in both aspects-I can depend on him a little bit more.

Scott: **Be at Derek’s tonight by seven. Something’s going on and I can’t tell what it is.  
** Stiles: **Alright. See you then.**

Sure enough, by Seven O’clock, everyone is assembled in the subway station, standing around for Derek to start talking.

Derek opened his mouth; eyes flashing red, basically saying “I don’t want any interruptions until I’m done” and it was loud and clear to me. “I know that, in light of recent events, it’s been… difficult, for some of us.” His eyes flash, briefly, over certain members before continuing. “Including myself. And, to be honest, I don’t know how much longer I can keep doing this, the whole ‘Alpha’ thing.” He stops, gathering his thoughts.

My eyebrows slowly furrow, but not enough to be noticed; where the hell did _that_ come from? I understood that we were all hanging by a thread, this pack of ours, but… really? It came as a shock to most of us, if I was reading their faces right.

He gets ready to continue. “I know most of you are going away for college,” Derek looks around at the majority of the group. “But I know one or two of you are staying here.” He meets my gaze, and then Scotts. “If we can stay together as a pack for the rest of this year, then I won’t keep you around; I won’t let you suffer with my terrible leadership. You can all find better Alphas, better packs.” That was one of the things that the head Alpha had said to him; had made him doubt enough so that everything Derek did, he questioned.

“So, what?” Erica says, speaking up. “You’re just going to abandon us? Give us away to some other pack, and stop caring?” He looks at her, arms crossed.

“I never said I was abandoning you, nor did I give you away. You remember well enough the last time you ‘abandoned’ me.” Erica shut her mouth in a quick manner, and she surrendered her gaze. He turned back to all of us. “I’m not telling you that you’re no longer in this pack; if you want to stay here, then fine. But if you no longer want to be under my lead, then I won’t stop you.” He looked utterly defeated, but firm in his decision. “So, unless someone has an issue that needs to be brought up, then we’re pretty much done here.”

I nod, raising my hand like an idiot. “I, uh, actually have something to bring up.” I wasn’t nervous about the reactions of everyone; in fact, I was ready to see them. “I’m not staying here after graduation.” I say, firmly. “I got accepted to a few colleges in New York, and I’m making the road trip in the middle of June. I didn’t know if we would see each other between now and that time, so I thought I’d say it now.” I shrugged, moving my hands to my pockets.

The range of emotions at that bit of info was just as I expected; Scott and Lydia both looked equal amounts of sad; Erica seemed surprised; Isaac didn’t say anything, just had his eyes downcast to the ground; and Derek, well, Derek looked some sort of heartbroken, the hurt apparent in his eyes mostly. I licked my lips, swallowing nervously, not daring to meet anybody’s gaze.

“Wait, when were you going to tell us this?” Scotts’ voice had the anger I had expected right around the edges.

“Because I wasn’t?” I say in a deadpan, looking him in the face. “I mean, come on guys; after the recent events, why would I?” I slowly grew angrier. “We’re all hanging on by a thread as it is; nobody talks to each other anymore like before; my dad doesn’t even talk to me at all, because of what happened these past few months; and I don’t remember the _last time_ that any of us hung out besides the pack meetings.” I stopped myself, not wanting to get any angrier. “I’m going. If any of you want me, you’ll know how to reach me.” I stormed off, making a note to turn my phone off when I got home.

* * *

I didn’t necessarily go home first; I stopped out by the preserve to clear my head. I thought it would be difficult to leave everyone behind, but after tonight it only showed _easy_ it would be if I just up and went, without a word. Sure, it would make them hate me, dad included, but that’s the funny thing with time and distance; wounds heal. And if I was far away, they wouldn’t have to worry about seeing me while the healing process was happening.

Still, it would be difficult not seeing everybody’s faces, or even calling them or talking to them whenever the time or situation called. But, if they could move on with it, then I could too.

It was probably closer to one a.m. when I pulled home. After dad stopped trusting me, he really didn’t care where I was, not nearly as worried any more about me. Just one of the joys of being me, I guess.

I also wasn’t expecting to freak out as much as I did, when Derek was standing in my dark room. Ever since he stopped needing a researcher, he stopped coming around. That was the pattern I realized; as soon as the danger dissipated, nobody really needed me anymore.

“Jesus, Derek!” I shout, regaining my composure. “What the hell?” I shuck my shoes off, going to the dresser by my bed.

“I’m-” he begins, but I stop him with a hand.

“Yeah, yeah, ‘I’m the Alpha’ and all that shit.” I said that part in his stupidly broody voice, going through my dresser to find sweatpants.

“Not exactly what I was going to say.” He said, clearing his throat. Even in the dark, I was sure his eyebrows were drawn in an annoyed way like usual.

“Then what is it?” I ask, clearly tired and annoyed. He was just looking down, sadness in his features. I exhaled, softening my tone and expression. “Derek, what did you come to me for?”

He looks up at me, the moonlight casting a sickly pale glow across one side of his face. He looked… well, wrecked is as good a term as any. “Why didn’t you say anything sooner?” His voice is quieter.

I groaned. This really wasn’t something I wanted to deal with after tonight. “I, I don’t know. You tell me, why would I stay after the mess that’s happened in the past few months? Would you really want to stay when your friends rarely talk to you anymore, and your father doubts most of what comes out of your mouth?” It was an unfair comparison, knowing his dad was dead. But it’s one I used regardless.

“You could fix it. That’s what most people do anyways.” He shifts closer, staring me right in the face.

“And then what?” I ask, not breaking his gaze. “I fix everything and its fine and dandy, and I go to Beacon Hills University? Get a piss poor degree and make dinner with the pack every night?” I shake my head, tugging my hair in frustration; I had grown it out at the beginning of junior year, and it’s stayed that way ever since. “I don’t want that, Derek. I know I might have said that to make everyone happy, but that was just it; I didn’t say it to make me happy. I want to see the world, and not just stay in one place.” I was aware of Derek becoming closer and closer to me as I spoke each bit, making my case to leave more and more valid. Not like I needed it to _be_ valid in the first place. “Derek, I’m really tired, and I just want to go to bed.”

He looked conflicted, like he wanted to say, or do, something. I swallowed, crossing my arms and staring at him. “I…uh-”I rolled my eyes, moving past him.

“When you figure it out, will you please just let me know? Or better yet, do this when I’m better rested.” I went to move to the bathroom, to shower, before I was pressed against the wall. “Derek, wha- _mmmph.”_  I didn’t get a chance to finish before his mouth pressed against mine. “Is this what you came all the way over here for?” I slide a hand under his jacket-that stupidly _sexy_ leather jacket that I hate to love-and fist in his Henley.

“No,” he says, “I want you.” He pushes his tongue into my mouth, me smiling against his mouth. _Yeah, I’d like that too,_ I think. Then I remember that I actually need to _move_ my mouth to make words. But, I was a little preoccupied at the moment.

He thinks about what he said for a moment, running his tongue over my bottom lip, before speaking again. “No, I mean I _want_ you.” Wait… what is he saying? Oh! Oh. _That’s unexpected._

“O-okay. I’ve never done that before… Kind of expected to let you and your wolf powers go for the kill. Not to be cliché or anything like that, but just-“

“Stiles,” he mutters against my mouth. “Shut up.” And, okay, having him shut me up with his mouth, his _tongue,_ hell his whole _everything_ is more than enough for me. I experimentally run that hand lower, cupping his left cheek. By the breathy moan I got in response, he seemed to enjoy that. I squeeze a little, and he _bucks_ into my hips.

“Oh my god Derek, you really _do_ want this.” I swallow, looking him in the eyes. “Have you uh, ever, you know…?”

He looks at me. “Bottomed?” I nod. “Nope. So, you know… get on with it or something.” He was obviously nervous, but didn’t want to stop. I smile against his mouth, sucking his lower lip into my mouth.

“I want to s-see you,” I stutter, stripping his jacket from him, hands running underneath that Henley. The rest of our clothes follow suit soon afterwards, and Derek is soon on his knees, legs open wide to me. I place a hand on his right cheek, squeezing lightly. Hesitation was apparent, rolling off of me in waves. Derek’s voice snaps me out of my nervous funk.

“Stiles, what the hell are you _doing_ exactly?” He seemed-okay, more so _looked_ than seemed-annoyed.

“I’m sorry!” I say, defensively. “I’ve just, uh… never done this before. I mean, is it one finger, or two fingers, or do I use a bottle and shove-“

“I’ll rip your throat out, with my _teeth_ , if you finish that sentence. Now just do something besides what you’re doing, because I’m sort of _dying_.” He says the last part with a strain, looking back at me. My breath goes ragged, so I squirt some lotion on his, _area,_ and just kind of-

“Stiles,” he says, eyes locked with mine again. “You don’t have to prep me; I won’t break, you know. Just _come on_.”

“I just, uh… thought-“

“Yeah, you thought, that’s the thing. You don’t have to think with this, because I won’t judge you.” He waited a beat. “ _Please._ ” Okay, maybe that small plea was what made me grab the lotion off of my desk.

“Do you want to be like this, or on your back?” I ask, quietly. I had to set the bottle down on the bed, not wanting him to see how _nervous_ I was.

He thinks about this for a moment, before flipping onto his back, giving me enough of an answer. Then the realization kicked in full force. _Oh shit, I’m about to have sex with a guy. An actual_ man _and not just my hand like usual. I mean, what if I hurt Derek? What if I do something he doesn’t like?_

“Stiles,” Derek says, gripping my forearm. “Relax. And don’t think about it. Just, do it.” I nod and slather my dick with lotion. Derek watches from above with an approving look, inhaling as I line myself up.

“Exhale,” I say, pushing in right as he does so. And the feeling is…

Well, that’s pretty short of fucking incredible. The low moan that escaped my lips I tried to will back inside, but sadly, no. It was gone forever in the abyss of sexual noises.

“Move.” He grits out, throwing his head back.

“Can’t.” I say right back. I mean, with the same tone and everything.

“And why the fuck not?” He inquires, tone annoyed.

“Because,” I say, shooting a withering look his way. “If I move, this will be over before it even begins. And I don’t want that.”

He chuckles. “Oh, it doesn’t matter if you do this quick or slow; because this isn’t the last time we’re doing this.” My hips shoot forward without me knowing how it happened; then I was filled in him halfway. He groans at this movement, urging me to go all the way in.

He whimpers when I push in further, throwing his head back, and his canines extending past his mouth. I can feel that familiar feeling of orgasm curl around the base of my spine, signaling the end of this moment. I slowly pulled back out of him, only to push back in slowly. A low whine, almost too quiet to hear, came from him, and he wrapped a hand around his dick, exhaling slowly with his eyes closed.

It’s too much to look at; when I shove all the way in for only a _second_ time, I swear through my orgasm, hanging onto his thigh for dear life. When I calm down from it, breathing slowing to an easy rhythm, I can feel a blush slowly creep from head to shoulders to chest. Derek chuckles from his position, and I roll my eyes. “This _really_ isn’t my best moment, to be honest. Oh my god, I’m so embarrassed.” I hide my face in his leg, not wanting to look.

He scoffs lightly. “Shut up. It’s not the end of the world, like I said before.” I really couldn’t even think about yesterday, let alone two minutes ago or whatever, so I shrug. “Whatever you say,” I reply, muffled slightly by his leg.

When I look back, he’s stroking himself, eyes closed to concentrate on what he was doing. “Want some help with that?” I ask, a small grin playing across his face. One of his eyes cracks open, giving me a “ _really_?” kind of look. “What?” I ask, my hands defensive. He rolls his one eye, and gets back to it. “I’m the one still buried inside of you, so I’d be quiet.”

“Didn’t say anything,” He spits back, voice strained. I reach down, a hand lightly squeezing his balls. He breathes out, locking eyes again with me.

“Want me to stop?” I ask, stopping. He shakes his head, and I take it as a victory. I twist my hand a little bit, and he suddenly went rigid. I think I did something bad, until I realize he was having his orgasm. He was quiet while this happened, but his face spoke more than enough to make up for that, entirely blissed out and open.

When I pulled out finally, his dick gives a little lurch, before resting against his stomach. We were quiet for a minute, just looking at each other as the light of what just happened settled. His breathing was easy, and he looked more relaxed than he had in quite some time. I personally felt on top of the world in a way, totally awesome and smiley. Well, there was one thing that I could use right about now.

I got up, looking over my shoulder. “I’m gonna shower. Want to join me perhaps?” His glare was more than enough for an answer, and I snickered as I left for the bathroom. The water was warm, and it soothed my totally blissed out body. A few content sighs escaped my lips, but I was able to clean myself up pretty thoroughly.

“Derek, I was curious-” I didn’t finish that sentence, because… well, because Derek was gone. At first I was confused. But then I became angry and hurt. _Was this just to keep me around? Was he seriously_ that _much of an asshole?_ Then my eyes caught on the note sitting up on my desk.

 _Sorry; by now, you’re probably way overthinking this and are regretting this entirely. I heard your dad’s police cruiser pull into the driveway, so I had to go. We’re talking about this tomorrow though._ –D.

 _Well, that was reassuring,_ I thought to myself. Shrugging, I got into bed that smelled of sex and, even less noticeable, of Derek.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for the support on this fic, everyone :) It really means a lot. More is said at the bottom. So go there~

The morning after was… well, the morning after; I didn’t see unicorns running across the yellowing horizon, or even someone sitting across from me giving the “congratulations for losing your v-card to some totally hot guy!” speech. That right was probably better reserved for someone like Scott. Or Lydia.

Yeah, Lydia is definitely who’d be giving it, not Scott.

“mmmm _ugh”_ came from my mouth in a sound of protest. I was stiff, and I wasn’t just talking about last night.

 _Last night,_ I thought in my head, a small grin playing across my face. I hid my face in my blanket, hiding the blush that was creeping up on me. Sure, nobody could see me, but it was habit.

Sighing, I got out of bed and stretched, moving towards the bathroom. I looked at myself in the mirror, and okay, I didn’t look too bad; sure, I had a few bruises from where he grabbed me and I looked a little bit flushed, but everything else _seemed_ alright.

Just then a knock came from the doorway, showing my dad standing there.

“Hey, uh, Dad…” Smooth, I thought to myself.

He nods. “Can you take out the trash before you head to school?”

I nod. “Sure thing, Dad.”

He nods again, before giving me a funny look. “You look different…” he says, tone suspicious.

I shrug, looking at him through the mirror. “I don’t, you know, _feel_ different. But I’m not under any sort of influence, if that’s what you mean.” _That was even smoother_ , I say to myself mentally. But he doesn’t seem to egg it on, so he just leaves.

I exhale, feeling nothing short of dodging some sort of bullet. I don’t know how he would react when he found out-probably either give me a stern talking to, or shoot whoever it was that was on the receiving end. Probably say something along the lines of “Stilinskis’ don’t lie back and take it, so consider yourself lucky” before pulling the trigger.

Probably not though.

* * *

Scott sat next to me at the lunch table, nose wrinkling in a disgusted way. Instinctively, I sniff myself; I even remembered to put deodorant on and everything. “Okay, I _know_ I don’t smell that bad. What is it?” I did have a nagging suspicion of what it was before he even opened his mouth

“Dude, you _reek_ of Derek, like you rubbed yourself all over him. Why though?” Yep, that’s exactly what I thought it was.

“Uh, he came over and talked to me last night. That’s probably why.” I rolled a carrot around my plate, avoiding his gaze.

“No, I mean you smell. Like when me and Allison were together, and Derek said he could smell her on me.” Oh, _now_ I see what he’s getting at.

“I might have… you know, _done_ something with Derek last night.” I pause. “And I will be ashamed of you if you don’t get what I mean.” He realizes what I mean, and I return the answer with my eyebrows, leaning back.

“Dude, ew, why?” I shrug, ignoring his freaking out.

“I don’t really know how it happened, to be honest; one second he’s in my room, looking all sad and worried that I might leave him or something, and then he’s… under me.” I blow out a breath, not expecting the incredulous look on Scotts face.

“What? Derek, _submitting_ to you? I wouldn’t believe that for a second.” But when he sees I’m not shitting him, his eyes grow wider. “Seriously? Did he like, bare his neck to you and stuff?”

I laugh, slapping him in the arm. “Why a sudden interest Scott? Wanting to try the Alpha for yourself?” The disgusted look on his face was enough for another laugh. “I’m kidding, really.”

He swallows that look down, before going on. “Did he say anything else to you before it was over? Did you make a man out of him? When are you going to see him again?”

I stare at him. “What’s with all the questions?” He stares at me. “Ugh, fine. He said it wouldn’t be the last time we did _that._ I don’t think I did, I finished before it had gotten good. And he said he would talk to me about this a little later. Now, are we done with the questions? Because you look like you’re about to throw up if I say another word.” And he truly did, looking and probably feeling a little green around the edges.

“Hey, I should tell him to talk to you tonight. He might want a little bit more-“

“Okay, I am officially cutting you off.” I throw a hand over his mouth, stopping him from saying anything else. “I doubt he’ll want it twice in a row, he is ‘The Alpha’ anyways.” I say that last bit in a gruff tone, tensing my jaw just for good measure. The bell saves me from having to do any more explaining. Just then, Allison passes by, shooting me a tentative glance, completely overlooking Scott. The latter whined a tiny bit in the back of his throat, but didn’t let it faze him completely.

“Just give it time.” I pat his shoulder. “She’ll come back to you soon enough.” I knew that was probably a lie, but it didn’t sound like it; at least to him.

“I know.” He nods sulkily, parting ways to go to class.

* * *

The tapping snapped me out of whatever I was thinking about; I think it either had something to do with unicorns, or the latest comic update of “of werewolves and men.” Don’t ask.

I slide the window open to let Derek in, sitting in my chair facing him; he looks a little better, a little bit of a glow to his skin, and definitely a lot healthier. His features are a little less hard, and he looks more relaxed.

 _Oh good,_ I think. _That definitely means he won’t try to tell me_ that was a mistake, what we did, Stiles.

I swallow uncertainly, wringing my hands, unsure of where to look, not sure if looking at his face is a smart move. “So…” I begin, hesitantly, glancing up at him. “W-what did you want to talk about?”

He scoffs. “Relax; I could probably smell your nerves from the street.” There’s no rudeness to the tone though; it’s calming, even a little bit soothing. I exhale a breath I didn’t know I was holding, looking at him face on now. He takes a moment, gathering his thoughts, before beginning. “I’m, uh… Sorry for how last night ended.”

I smile a bit. “Forget about it; you left me a note. I’m not angry at you.” He looks a little bitter at me for cutting him off. “Right, sorry. You have the, uh… _floor._ ”

He swallows, getting back into his spiel. “I just wanted you to know that, that _last night_ was amazing. And, I hope it was good for you too.”

I snort a laugh. “Yeah, of course it was good for me. I mean, I wish I had lasted longer, and that you had _actually_ marked me in some way, but otherwise… I’m good. I’m great, even. I would like to do that a lot more often, if I’m completely honest with you.”

He chuckles. “Yeah, well remember what I promised you last night.” The glint in his eyes is enough to send a small shiver down my back, but it’s not noticeable. Instead, I stand up and move over to him slowly. “Stiles, what are you-“

I move into his space and wrap my arms around his neck, placing a small kiss on the part of his jaw right below his ear. The movement is effortless, easy. He pauses for a second, before wrapping his arms around my waist, exhaling. “Thanks. For the talk.” I feel him nod, but I pull back. “Is there something else then?” He nods again, and I move back from him, leaning on the desk.

He shoots for easy first. “Are you still thinking about college on the east coast?”

Yeah, definitely not easy.

I swallow, thrown by the question. “Uh, probably… I don’t plan on _not_ going to a different college; they were the only ones I got scholarships too.” I almost said _they were the only ones I bothered applying to_ but I didn’t.

He nods. “Well, last night was about that too.” He holds up a hand for him to be uninterrupted. “I just wanted to let you know that, even when you go to College, that… you’ll always have a home here. That you’ll always be _wanted_ here, even if everyone isn’t around anymore, you’ll be wanted.” Derek was skirting around what he really wanted to say, I could tell; I don’t want you to go. I want you to stay, with me, here. It was a heartbreaking sight, but I was adamant in my decision.

“Derek; thank you. I know I’ll always have a home here. Always. I mean, my relationship is strained with Dad right now, but it will get better. At least, I hope.” I shrug, leaning back. “But, yeah. I’ll come back for Christmas and Thanksgiving and an occasional birthday, and make sure I’m still here, even if I’m a few thousand miles away.” I pause a second. “And plus, I can always Skype with you; I’m not ditching you guys. Just going away for a bit.”

Derek stood there, eyes downcast, but like he’d soaked in all of that information. “I really don’t have much to say besides that.” We meet gazes, and I shift a bit in my seat. He goes to jump out my window again, but I stop him at the last second.

“Hey Derek?” He turns back to me. “You’re a nice guy. Don’t think that you’re not.” I smiled a bit, and that seemed to do the trick; a light seemed to click on in his eyes, and his face visibly softened. Then he was gone, and I was left alone in my room. I strode over to the window and slid it down, leaving it unlatched. Normally I left it locked, but something told me to not lock it.

And I did that.

* * *

Surprisingly, time went quickly for everyone; the rest of April passed quick enough, and soon May was starting to begin to bleed into June. Prom passed, me at home marathoning some three part movie series that looked interesting enough. Scott stopped by once, asking me to tie his tie because his mom was working a late shift. Lydia texted me a “wish you were here” and I replied with “why” and got back a “nobody to dance with :(“ Maybe I should have rented a tux. But no ticket anyways.

Yeah. It was going to be different without everyone in the same vicinity for college.

* * *

Everybody came by more often, I noticed. Erica came over to talk about college up north, bringing some kind of baked good that she tried her hand at. I couldn’t find the heart to tell her how bad it truly was.

* * *

Lydia talked about Jackson a lot, but she stopped when it was time to stop. Conversation came easy to us, especially after the incident with Gerard and Peter. We grew even closer when Jackson was taken. That would probably never change.

* * *

Isaac didn’t really talk about much, nor did he pretend. He just wanted to be close, trying to take as much of my scent, before I left. I didn’t complain. I just let him soak it in before I was gone for a few months. It was a strange understanding.

* * *

Allison surprised me, when she showed up at my door. I thought she had looked lifeless before, but now it was even more apparent; the previous warmth in her face and eyes were gone, instead replaced with a cruel, cold, dead stare. “I heard you’re leaving Beacon Hills.” She said. I nod. “It’s good you are; especially with what’s to come.” After that she left, not even stopping to stay inside.

I didn’t let whatever she said sink in. I probably should have.

* * *

Scott becomes even more like a best friend to me, and I become his support; we sink back into our old ways, laughter and the sound of dying filling the room once more. We didn’t talk about being on separate parts of the country, didn’t need to.

We didn’t need to talk about it. What was needed to be said was said, and it wasn’t pushed further on.

* * *

The phone call came at eleven. I was asleep at ten, hoping to get some sleep for tomorrow since there was something important for seniors to attend, but somebody had other plans. I reach for my phone, the brightness nearly blinding.

“Hello?” I grumble out, rubbing the sleep from my eyes.

“Stiles? It’s… It’s Derek.” Derek was agitated, voice clearly strained and… he sounded _nervous._ Derek _never_ sounded nervous. This couldn’t be good.

“Derek? What’s going on? Is everything alright.” A thought goes through my head. “They didn’t come back for Erica, did they?” The silence is enough of an answer.

“No, but… you _need_ to get over here. Now. And that’s not just a request, that’s where I will drag you to my place with my teeth if you don’t do it.”

“Relax, holy _shit_.” I was already throwing on a shirt and tugging on my jeans at that point. “I’m heading over there right now. So untwist your little wolfie panties and I’ll be there in a few.”

“You better” is growled out, and then the line cuts.

“The word 'goodbye' is a nice thought” I grumble, grabbing my keys and heading out.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> okay, so, I shot for seriousness between Stiles and Derek, and probably missed it by a mile. But if I didn't, then great! *cackles* To be honest, I don't have a clear idea on where I'm heading for the majority of this in all seriousness, so if it turns crappy after a few chapters, my apologies in advance.
> 
> Also, sorry for a cliffhanger; I'm evil that way. Next chapter will be Derek POV, so get ready for it. Even though it's probably completely obvious what I'm leading up to, still get excited. 
> 
> Thanks again :)


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, so this is me having creative license with the whole "pregnant Alpha" thing. Basically, Alpha's CAN get pregnant, but it's rare, so nearby packs won't be able to smell it. They'll still sense it, but either they won't, or someone else, probably won't act on it until the last few months of the pregnancy. Which is where I will probably bring in the drama (right around the 3/4 mark of the fic. But don't hold me to it.)
> 
> So basically, I’m making this up as I go, so don’t come running to stab me with pitchforks.
> 
> Besides; I’d like that too much anyways *cackles* Torches included ;) Okay, enjoy the chapter~

**Derek POV**

_You’re a nice guy. Don’t think that you’re not._

Those words hung fresh on my ears. They still rang loudly, as if they were shouted just now. They weren’t, but the impact was enough that it was just as so.

Stiles didn’t see me as a monster. He probably hasn’t seen me as a monster since the pool incident. Just as someone who would rip his head off in a moment if the time came. And to be truthful, I probably would.

But that’s for another time. Okay, maybe it _wouldn’t_ be for another time, maybe not ever, but still.

* * *

I found myself instinctively reaching for Stiles in the middle of the night, like I wanted him there. A small whine escaped my mouth when he wasn’t there, and I curled around a pillow as a weak substitute.

Yeah, it would be hard to let Stiles go when he was gone.

* * *

I could tell there was something different about me as the weeks progressed. First of all, well… I had to pee. Like, a _lot._ Normally it wasn’t an issue, but this was different. It was like anything that went into my bladder needed to get out.

Erica picked up on it, joking around with me. “Need to pee _again?”_ she would laugh when I’d shoot her a look, like it’s the funniest thing in the world to have to pee excessively during the day. “Are you sure you didn’t get a spell cast on you by that last witch? Maybe she messed with your junk or something. I don’t want to know about how your bits work, so don’t start with me.” It’s not like I would have explained or anything… Okay, maybe I would have just to shut her up.

The need to pee I could deal with. Sure, it was annoying, but I could deal with a few extra bathroom breaks. There was just one other part I couldn’t stand.

* * *

The vomiting came a little bit later.

And none of that vile, black stuff when too much wolfsbane was ingested; this was when you get a stomach ache, or you eat something funny. Normally it filters out, but this was different.

First it was in the morning; heaving, retching, sweat inducing puking. Erica was always there, not so much _there_ but in the doorway, making sure I was okay, watching until I could sit without puking up whatever I ingested. She would be gone after that, but she would always be there when I needed it.

I don’t know when she became so close, maybe even a bit supportive. But it was better to have one person who cared than nobody at all.

I was also getting a lot moodier; angry, mostly, but it was so close to me, that it was the first thing. I would snap at the tiniest things; Erica tapping an off rhythm beat on the floor, whenever a bird would “caw” off in the distance, sometimes even the way the leaves rustled. Everything was hypersensitive, even the rustling from my shirt when I moved was loud in my ears.

But then these tears-seriously, when the _hell_ did I start crying?-would just start up, and it would leave me both dumbfounded and drained. Erica even came over and let me sob on her shoulder when it got _really_ bad.

So this pattern continued on for a few weeks, all throughout May, but then stopping for a week, before hitting me just as hard right after. I really _did not_ know what was going on with me. I grunted in annoyance, pulling a piece of rotted wood off what was left of the wall while doing so. I thought back to what my mother would say, how she would try to figure this out with her Alpha senses, my father would do his best to aid me, how Laura would laugh about how I was showing t-

Wait, Laura. Laura was pregnant before she… no, best not think about that. She was pregnant. Pregnant.

_Oh shit._

“No,” I muttered, taking a step back and tripping over a bucket, falling down. Erica poked her head in a moment later; looking at my body sprawled out.

“You okay?” I don’t hear what else she says, too focused on what I was thinking. When Laura was pregnant… she got sick easily. The bathroom was almost always occupied-good thing we had four bathrooms-and the sound of bile splashing in the toilet awoke quite a few of us every morning.

Well? I had all those symptoms, but amplified. But there was _no way._

“Derek.” I was being shaken, Erica staring at me straight in the face. “Are you okay? I mean aside from tripping like a jackass.” My face was pale when I looked at her. Her head pulled back a bit, concern flitting across her features for a second. Just like Erica; she didn’t do concern, or anything sappy. She rarely even showed any emotion after what Gerard did.

This time was different. 

“Erica.” She perks up, standing and looking at me. “I need you to take my keys, go to the store and buy me…” God, this was _odd._ “Pregnancy tests.” I looked at her, getting a snort and then a full on laugh from her. When she saw I wasn’t joking, she looked at me weirdly.

“Derek; are you high off of wolfsbane or something? And yes, I _did_ read the journals, so I know you can do that.”

“Erica” I snap out, eyes flashing red. “Just do it!”

She jumps, throwing her hands up, eyes flashing gold for a second before turning back to normal. “Okay, okay! Jeez, you’re like me during my certain time of month.” She takes the keys and wallet extended to her, and walks out of the house. This wasn’t something worthy of freaking out of in the long run, but… _god,_ it was rare. So rare that barely anything was documented on it. I’d be going into this blind basically, with almost nobody to lean on.

* * *

The sound of the Camaro pulling back snapped me out of my thoughts. I stood up, going to where there should be a door-note to self; _never_ let Isaac and Erica get in a fight _again_ \- and took the bag Erica was holding. She followed behind me as I locked myself in the bathroom.

“Awe, come on; I want to see if you’re carrying child too!” She pounded on the door, half-heartedly, before seemingly sitting on the ground next to the door. “Just don’t shut me out.”

“Wasn’t planning on it. Just don’t pick up on my emotions; I want to be the first to find out.” I nearly tear the box in half to get them out. They’re all wrapped in a plastic, similar to the popsicles I used to eat as a kid. I unwrap one and stare at it, like it’s the most obscene and disrespectful thing on the planet. “How the hell do these things _work?”_ I say aloud, staring at it.

“Just take off the blue thing and pee on the exposed part.” She says it like it’s the most obvious thing on the planet.

“But it’s all exposed.” I say, staring at the stick. And blue thing? What the hell does that mean?

I can literally hear the “are you _shitting me_ right now?” tone coming off of her as she replies. “Take the blue part _off the end_ and then pee on what’s exposed after that. Seriously, how on _earth_ did you become Alpha?” The tone is joking, not meant to be hateful.

I take the blue part off-seriously, _that’s_ what you pee on? Weird-and clear my throat. “Yeah, well nobody really prepares you for this. Now _shut up._ ” A small sound is all I get for an approval of doing so. “Okay, so… how long are you supposed to wait?” I open the door, looking at her, handing the stick to her. Instead she strolls by, grabbing the box and skimming the back.

“Here; _wait five to ten minutes for best results._ So, take your fancy phone out of your pocket, set the timer for ten minutes and hit start after peeing on the stick.” After I set it, she keeps reading. “ _Tests are not 100% positive. To ensure full accuracy, please contact your local doctor or physician._ ” She takes a look. “I guess that means Deaton.” She sets the box down, huffing a laugh, then gesturing to the other tests. “I’d pee on four or five.” She looks at me in a challenging way. “What? It’s what everyone in the movies does. It’s what _I’d_ do if I were in your shoes.” Erica gives me a reassuring pat on the shoulder before leaving and closing the door, reassuming her position.

I exhale, setting my hands on the counter, before moving them to unzip my jeans. I stand in front of the toilet and wait. And wait.

And wait.

…And wait.

God, what is _taking so long._

And then I wait some more.

“You’ve been in there for almost twenty minutes; what’s going on?” Sounds from behind the door. Erica’s getting testy. Hell, even I’m getting testy.

“I just… can’t. get it. Out.” I grit each word, shaking myself, hoping that would help. It didn’t. It only made the situation more awkward.

“Think of rushing water. Niagara Falls. The beach. Anything wet, really.” She snorts like it’s funny, but stops at that. “And don’t forget to pee on more than one. Very important!”

“Shut up” I shoot back, opening four new tests. I groan, pausing for a second and looking over to the sink. Sure, it had shitty water pressure, but the sound of running water should actually help. And when I closed my eyes, listening to just the sound of water, I thought of me out in nature, the river rushing by, the sounds of the forest all around and-

Yep, that did the trick.

I exhale, grabbing each one and peeing on it, then setting them back down and hitting the timer. “Did you finally pee? Sounds like you did.” She knocks.

I let her in, nodding. And that’s how we end up sitting on the edge of the half destroyed bathtub, waiting for the timer to count down. “They could always end up negative” she reminds me, and I nod in agreement.  There always is that possibility, but I just _felt_ in my gut-okay, I guess I did just say that-that I was. And was it weird that I wasn’t _against_ having this cub in my stomach?

“What do I do if the test is negative?” I ask, looking at her.

She thinks for a second. “I guess life just goes on. You don’t have to worry about anything else except waiting until Stiles leaves.” She doesn’t say the last part in sadness, just a knowing; like she knows he’s going to do it regardless.

“What if it’s positive?” I exhale, thinking this situation could become more and more real.

Another pause to think. “Then we-the pack-will help you take care of him. Or her. Or maybe both?” I scoff at that notion, shaking my head. A pregnant Alpha is rare; having more than one at a time is even rarer. “Do you want this…baby? If you end up pregnant?”

The answer surprises even me, who was so sure of an answer, I didn’t think it would come quickly; I nod my head, looking at her in earnest. She gets a small smile, like she likes this answer, before looking at the timer.

30 seconds left.

 _Better do this quickly,_ I think to myself.

“Listen, Erica,” I begin, putting a hand on her shoulder, making her look in my direction. “In case something happens to me, while having these kids; in case I can’t be around to raise them,” she opens her mouth to protest, but I look at her, so she stops. “I want you to take care of my kids. And if he sticks around, Stiles too. Can you promise me that?” She looks at me funny for that last part, but looks a little bit choked up. “Little” being the keyword.

“Wait a second, Der -“

“Erica, tell me that you will.” I push onwards.

“Derek-“

“Erica, I’m not reading these tests until you tell me what I want to hear.”

She scoffs. “What makes you think I won’t snatch them up before you do that?” She stands, quickly makes a grab for it, but I’m faster, snatching them away and holding them out an arm’s length away.

“Because I’m the Alpha. Now _please_.” She quirks an eyebrow. “And I only ask nicely _once_.” It was true.

She takes a better look at me, and then smirks. “Fine, I guess. But only if you name one of them after me.”

I laugh softly. “Middle name, maybe.”

Her face goes moody. “Fine.” She looks at my hand, then to me. “You ready?” I steel my nerves and exhale, nodding. The test is one of those that give you the signs of whether or not you’re pregnant on the actual stick. I pull one in front of my face, and look.

 _Positive._ All four said the same exact thing.

Pregnant. I’m pregnant. Holy shit.

Erica reaches for them, but sniffs the air. “Your heartbeat just picked up. I’m guessing you are, indeed, positive?” She takes them out of my hand, reads them over, and looks at me. “Indeed you are. So, if you’re the one pregnant, I guess you’re the _mother._ ” She stifles a giggle, then rights herself when I push her.

“Shut up” I snap, but it’s not hateful.

She nods. “Sorry, sorry. So, who’s the father then? Who impregnated you? Because, damn, I sure would like whatever _he’s_ serving, if you know what I mean.” She was joking, but I knew what she meant; when she had found out she couldn’t conceive, it very nearly broke her. But now it was just fuel to make her push harder. Like saying “if I can’t have my own kids and protect them, then I’ll protect whatever else I love from harm.”

The only time she didn’t hold up on that was with Boyd. It still pains her to think about it.

“I… I don’t know, honestly.” Then it hit me. Hit me like a giant shot of wolfsbane to the gut.

Stiles.

I lurched, falling forward, before pulling myself up with the toilet. “It’s Stiles. He’s the father.” She takes that in, before a small laugh escapes. “I’m serious; he’s the only one I’ve submitted to like that.” The smile disappears when I tell her that, eyes growing wide, before she shoots up.

Anger replaces the surprise, and she steps close enough to feel it, let alone smell it. “This wasn’t… you couldn’t… You didn’t just have sex with him so he wouldn’t leave, did you? Because, Derek, if you did, I can’t guarantee I won’t gut you right here and now.” The anger coiled off of her in waves, intensifying. It was stifling, and I had to take a step back.

“It wasn’t like that. I just… wanted to let him know how important he is. But then one thing turned into another and… this, happened” I pointed to my stomach when I said “this” and looked at her. The anger was no longer there, which was a relief. “Don’t think I would ever do that.” I put a reassuring hand on her shoulder, and she relaxed.

“Alright... And I wouldn’t have gutted you. My head would probably have rolled before that happened.” She smiles, before walking out of the bathroom, me soon behind. “Maybe you should call him? Tonight? Just so this doesn’t drag out.”

I shake my head. “He might be asleep. I don’t know if I want-“

She smacks me over the head. “Derek Hale, by god, you got yourself into this,” she hands me my phone, which she snatched out of the bathroom. “Don’t make excuses and _call._ Right _now._ ” She pokes me in the chest at that last word, punctuating it further. Sensing there was also a finality in it, I nod.

When did my hands start shaking? No. I could _do this._

Contact Info: Stiles Stilinski

Call.

There it was, sitting there completely innocent. All I had to was press the button and…

Oh god, I _couldn’t_ do this. No, that’s a lie. Of course I can.

The phone rings. No turning back now.

“Hello?” comes from the other line. It sounds scratchy, mumbly, like he probably got woken up with my call. And now I have guilt.

Not really.

“Stiles? It’s Derek,” when did I sound so strained? And was that nervousness in my voice? In fact I think it was.

“Derek? What’s going on? Is everything alright.” I’m about to reply when he cuts me off. “They didn’t come back for Erica, did they?” I hear rustling after a second, like clothes being thrown on haphazardly. _Why would they come back for Erica,_ I think to myself. _They’re all dead anyways._

“No, but… you _need_ to get over here. Now. And that’s not just a request, that’s where I will drag you to my place with my teeth if you don’t do it.” I was getting growly, and on edge, the hormones I guess kicking in again. God, why were they so _rampant?_ I’d worry about that later.

“Relax, holy _shit._ I’m heading over there right now. So untwist your little wolfie panties and I’ll be there in a few.”

I nod. “You better.” I hang up, looking at Erica. “He’ll be here in a few minutes. I guess we have to wait at this point.

She nods. “Alright.” She folds her arms, looking at me with intent. “There is always the chance that

“Erica, I’m aware of that. But for some reason I have this… instinct. Like I just _know_ , in a weird way, I guess.” Is this what people go on and on about when they’re pregnant?

“Makes sense to me.” She pushes herself off the wall, walking away. “It’s still a reasonable hour, so I’m going to go ask Isaac’s Aunt if I can stay the night. You and him have… a lot to talk about.” She grabs her jacket off a chair and walks out, tossing a careless wave behind her.

I wanted to call out to her to stay, for support. But this was _my_ issue. I dealt with the Alpha pack, and the mistrust between all of us before. The worst that could happen was him completely rejecting me. Although, that is _still_ an

Great. Now I have doubt.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> OH MY GOD.
> 
> Okay, hi. Sorry that this is a long time coming, it's just been a busy couple of weeks, with graduation and finishing up classes and TEEN WOLF (yay, oh my god it's back) and just being lazy too. hahaha *trails off*
> 
> And also, I apologize if this is too pretty, too wrapped up perfectly, and too... for a lack of better word, perfect. I tend to do that a lot, and it's something I struggle with. But, hopefully it's not too bad.
> 
> Anyways, enjoy~

I didn’t really know what to expect as I headed over to Derek’s place. I mean, this was probably something he needed researched about some abnormal supernatural creature that couldn’t wait until tomorrow. I knew not to ignore it, especially after the mess I caused when I _did_ , in fact, ignore it.

That’s why, after Derek had finished off whatever _thing_ that goes “bump in the night,” he told me about various creatures that, indeed, were worse than kanimas.

I mean the stuff that he told me about sprites? I didn’t sleep for a week afterwards. I don’t think most people would have.

So now I made it my job that, if ever a pressing matter arose from him, I would be there. Just stinks that it’s at the expense of my sleeping schedule. 

*

I probably shouldn’t have taken my sweet time while driving to his house. And, okay, I might have _accidentally_ sat through a red light or two. But his loss for making me lose sleep.

I guess I should have prepared a little better for an angry Hale, outside of his “husk” of a house, arms folded and face set in a scowl. Steeling my nerves, I cut the engine and get out of the car. “uh, hey there...?” I say it as a question and a greeting, wanting to get this over with.

Besides his usual angry “bravado” he had twenty-four/seven, there was a nervous quality in his eyes. And just a bit in the corners of his mouth. But it was barely there.

“What kept you so long?” he asked, impatient. God, this guy was _moody_ as all hell today. What was up with that?

“Uh...” Eyebrows get raised. “Drop the caterpillars, bub.” He does, for a second. “Okay, fine; the traffic was bad; I missed a green light; I fell asleep because you decided to wake me up at nearly mid- hey, where are you going?” he had turned around before I could finish up my excuse train, heading to the door.

“I am not giving you this news outside.” He holds the door open for me, and I walk inside.

When I’m in the hallway, I turn to him. “This isn’t going to be bad, is it? Nothing about werebabies or cackling witches riding through the town on vacuum cleaners?” His face was confused, like he didn’t get the reference. “Oh come on; _Hocus Pocus?_ ” nothing. 

“It’s not like that, Stiles.”

I exhale, looking at him. “Well then what is it? Is Erica being bitchy again? Did you finally get on Scott’s good side? Please tell me, Derek, so I can get back to my date with my bed.” I yawn, as if proving a point.

“I just… Uh…” he looked uneasy. Nervous. Emotions that A) never have shown before on his face and B) made me wonder what was going on.

“Derek, just _say it._ ” He’s looking at the floor, the hole that’s nearly gaping in the floorboards, obviously more entertaining than what he has to say. “Derek, I’m not going to run _screaming_ from this shell, and-

“I’m pregnant.” He blurts out, still fascinated in that hole in the floorboards. That stops me for a second; hard task to do. At first I just stare at him, incredulous. The words don’t totally go through, so I laugh nervously. “That’s funny, Derek. I thought for a second you said-“

“I’m. Pregnant.” He says, slower, in a deadpan manner. “And,” He bites out, when I go to speak. He takes a breath, getting ready to drop the bomb. “I think… it’s yours.” He looks up at me for a second, before looking back down.

“So you mean that…” He nods. “And then you…” He nods again. “Well, how can I know if you’re telling the truth?” He looks up, and leaves, coming back with four identical pregnancy tests, all with the same results; Positive.

“And they uh…” I cough nervously. “Can’t have a false positive, right?” He shakes his head. “Right.” I swallow, holding on to the sticks still. “Can this happen, Derek? You’re the expert on furry problems besides Deaton here, you tell me.”

“It’s rare.” He says after a moment. “Most werewolves that shift fully can never carry because of that reason. But for someone, like me, who doesn’t, they have an easier time conceiving. But, an Alpha has a tougher time getting…” he was looking for the right term.

“Knocked up?” I ask, filling him in.

He coughs a bit at that, but nods. “Knocked up. And a _male_ is even harder. But, it’s not _unheard_ of, to get a male knocked up. Just…difficult.” That seems to be all he knows, or at least is aware of. He’s awfully quiet, like he’s just waiting for me to tell him “well, that’s great, but I’m still leaving to go to New York in a month.

Or was I? See, if tonight hadn’t of happened, I would probably be on the road to my new life. There wouldn’t be a second look back, and I probably wouldn’t even _think_ about Beacon Hills. Well, except for Christmas. Where all of us would be in different parts of the world, all of us changed; different people than what we were in High School. It would be different, far different. But then again…

There _was_ a little, furry (probably) and tiny baby-or was it a cub?-growing inside of Derek, that was half _mine._ I looked at his stomach, thinking about it. I knew that, at first, my mom didn’t really think too hard about kids. But when she did, in turn, become pregnant, she was just as excited as my dad was.

I wanted this. I surprised myself even at how _much_ I wanted this.

Really only one thing came to mind, and it was said with no tremble. So, without looking up, I ask him. “Do you think Beacon Hills Community College accepts late applicants?” That’s when I look up to see his face.

And that’s when I see it.

I’ve only seen that expression on his face one other time; back when the Kanima was running rampant. Back when the Alpha Pack was the least of our worries, and we had a much slimier problem to deal with.

The look I got when I said Jackson was an “abomination” was rare, for an alpha; a look that was so raw, so unfiltered and adulterated, it was dangerous. Dangerous enough that if it was around anyone dangerous, he would be an easy target. His walls were down at that point, and he was vulnerable.

But now, it’s taken on a new identity.

There’s similar qualities in there from before; surprise, vulnerability. But instead, there are new emotions, new sides to Derek even I was surprised he had in him.

 

Emotions like surprise.

 

And awe.

 

And realization.

 

But when the grin stretches across his face, slow and happy, well; there was really only one way to describe it.

_Joy._

Pure, blissed out, un-adulterated joy. Something that probably hadn’t surfaced since before the fire.

A small smile formed as he took a step towards me, and I closed the distance.

“You’re staying?” Derek asks, muffled against my hairline.

“Yeah, you big sourwolf; I’m staying.” A small whine escaped his throat. He’s happy. More than that; he’s relieved. Relieved, knowing that one of his “own” isn’t going so far away; that he can rest a little easier at night. I swallow, nodding. “I guess we’re having a baby?”

He scoffs in my ear, still breathing in my scent. “Stiles; the sticks have it. We kind of _are_.”

I let out a real laugh at that. “Oh my god, that was _kind of funny._ Derek Hale, funny?”  I pull back to look him in the face.

“Shut up. I can’t control _this_.” He gestures to himself.  “And besides, it wasn’t all that funny anyways.”

I smile. “Well I thought it was.” I look around, then back to him, shooting him a look. “I uh… should just let you know, that I’m not letting a kid in here _ever._ Especially if it’s _our kid_ we’re letting in here. So unless you’ve got an actual _house_ in those caterpillars you call eyebrows, that baby is staying. In. There.” I poked his stomach each time to accentuate what I was saying.

“I’ll build you a house if that’s what it takes.” He mumbles, looking at me honestly.

I scoff. “You say that now. Wait five or six months, and the only thing you’ll be saying is ‘Stiles, honey, my feet hurt. Can you rub them?’ Twenty bucks says I’m right.”

“You’re ruining the moment” is all he says, although the smile on his face is enough.

“Right, right, sorry…” I say, and then pull away for a second, kneeling down beside his stomach.

“What are you doing?” He asks, looking down at me.

“Shh,” I say, hesitating, before putting my ear to his stomach. “Hey, whoever is in there,” I say, probably talking to a peanut right now. “I know you _definitely_ can’t hear me in there, although if you could, that would be way cool. But, anyways, I just want you to know that you are going to be on the receiving end of so many cuddles and marvel movies and pretty much everything that’ll make you wish you were _still inside of here._ ” I look up from where I am, and Derek’s looking at me with a few emotions I can’t place.

“You’re an idiot.” He says, with no negativity in his voice.

“Yeah, but I’m _your_ idiot. So get used to it.” I reply with a half-smile. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *sniffs, wipes eyes with tissue* I just love a happy ending :')


	5. Chapter 5

It was hard to leave that night. It was hard to leave Derek when all I wanted to do was cuddle his stomach, talk to a ‘soon-to-be’ baby about the highs and lows of Call of Duty, but Derek, being the voice of reason, tells me “he or she can’t hear you” and “you have school tomorrow, go get some sleep.”

And that’s how I stay a smiling doofus all the way home, and into my room.

 _Well, damn_ , I think to myself. _I’m kind of fucked._

* * *

Most of our group is visibly different the next day. Or, at least some of them are; Lydia’s in one corner of the cafeteria, filing her nails like nothing else matters to her but the wellbeing of her cuticles.

On another side of the room, Isaac and Erica look fidgety, restless; like they are itching to _protect_ something. So what if that “something” was only a few weeks old.

What’s maybe _most_ surprising, though, is Allison keeps glancing over at me and Scott with a look of either confusion or calculation. It’s

“Hey, Scott; Allison’s giving us some weird looks, have you noticed?”

Scott’s slightly giddy at that. “Who cares _how_ she’s looking at us, just that she _is._ Like, dude… this is great.”

I scoff. “Stop thinking with your dick for a second and focus.”

“Maybe you’re just being paranoid” he says, raising an eyebrow. “Allison has had her moments, you know.” I do know; the reminder of her shooting Derek full of arrows fills my mind, making me grimace. “Well, anyways, she’s the one hanging back. Don’t worry about it.”

“Too late,” I say, nudging him. “It’s forever going to be in the back of my mind, nagging me.”

He rolls his eyes. “Sure. Anyways, Derek wanted to call a pack meeting today, and he wants you there. In fact, I think he actually said you were _required_ to be there.”

“I know, Scott; Derek texted me about it last night.” Not entirely true; Derek made sure I had his number before leaving that night.

“Wait, what? I thought you two weren’t friends?” He asks, eyebrows raising.

“What made you think that?”

“Well just-“

“You thought something without actually _thinking_ about it? Scott, when are you going to get that’s dangerous for you?”

“That’s not funny.”

“Really? I thought it was Hysterical. I’m still grinning and everything, too.” He punches my arm again, effectively ending that. “No, but I’ll be there. You might need to sit down for it, when the time comes.” I nudge him, ignoring the looks he was casting my way.

* * *

The pack dynamics were also different when we finally all met at Derek’s loft; Isaac and Erica were close, protective. They _definitely_ knew what was up, and this was definitely not something that happened a lot. Lydia seemed wary, and Scott, well…

“Dude, what is that weird _smell?_ It’s like, _you_ ,” he gestures to me. ”But softer, less apparent, but more so.” The werewolves stiffened, looking between one another. It was at this time that I was more than lucky that Scott wasn’t a part of one of those “teen mom” shows.

The thought makes me snort, making him even more curious.

“Well, this is quite nice, but would you mind telling us what this is, so I can get back to finishing up my personal statement?” Lydia chides, looking around. “What? It’s hard to get inspiration when your boyfriend recently dies to a red eyed beast, and the only joy around here seems to be that we’re all graduating.” It was true; there was no joy except for the thought of college, and becoming adults outside of Beacon Hills.

Well, not for long anyways.

“Sorry, for uh… calling you all here after such a small break between the two, meetings.” He was cautious, unsure of how to breach this. Sure, only two of the six in our group didn’t know, but still; it was kind of a big thing to admit. “Just that, there’s something that needs to be said. So, it’s-“

I cut him off, expecting to get berated after it. “I’m staying here to go to college. I just, think it’ll be better, regardless of the situation of my father…” I trail off; the way Derek is looking at me good enough reason to stop. “Right, sorry… there’s more to it, but I thought I would, Y’know, get that _out there._ ” Scott and Lydia’s similar looks of happiness morphed into ones of confusion, looking back to Derek.

Derek, nods, swallowing. “So, in some surprising turn of events, I have become pregnant. I’m expecting a c-child.” He says, arms folding awkwardly with the bump. Which was a lot bigger than I expected it to be at this stage.

Scott laughs nervously. “That’s funny, Derek. For a second, I thought you said that you-“

“are pregnant, _Scott._ I’m _pregnant_ , Scott. Want me to show you the sticks, because I can.” Scotts big eyes were enough of an answer, but he still didn’t believe it.

 “It’s true,” Erica says, chiming in from Derek’s left. “I was there with him when it happened. The sticks have it.” She folded her arms, and I finally let out another snort.

Scott swallowed, eyes going less…bug-eyed. “Well then, who’s the-“ he cuts himself off, realization dawning. His eyes flicker to me, and I shrug in a “What are you gonna do ‘bout it?” kind of way.

_Surprise!_

“You mean that… and with… you two… Is this even _possible?_ ” Scott asks, looking between me and Derek.

Derek shrugs. “It’s rare, would be impossible if I had the capacity to shift like Peter did.” He delves more into the schematics of the actual carrying of the baby (or did he say cub? I wasn’t sure.) About how the body would shift and, in turn, would kill the baby. How it was a tender process, which needed a lot of protection, and little activity, blah blah blah. I knew all this because of all the research I did throughout the years; there were plenty of traumatizing links about knotting and birth canals and other bizarro stuff you would only find online. 

When Derek finishes his spiel, Scott seems to get it, but is kind of blank. Lydia, however, makes a tiny squeal of content, but keeps herself reigned in. “I still wouldn’t mind seeing the test, if that’s okay.” Derek nods, pulling one of the tests out, handing it to her. She _definitely_ doesn’t keep composure, and is instead smiling. Erica shares this joy and I smile, turning my head away.

To my left, Scott is shifting on his feet, looking between Derek and his abdomen. “I still don’t believe you… Do you mind, if I…?” He scratches his ear, not meeting his eyes. Derek’s exhale is as much of a yes as Scott will get, so he kneels down and places an ear to Derek. When he _definitely_ hears something, he looks up.

“What was that about?” I ask.

Derek shrugs. “It’s nothing. Scott’s just a little mystified about the whole situation, that’s all.”

That’s a good enough answer for me.

* * *

After Scott leaves, Lydia finishes her conversation with Derek on possible names, and Erica and Isaac let me out from under them, I drove home. Dads cruiser wasn’t in the driveway so it was most likely he had taken double shifts at work again.

I exhaled at that, wishing things could be different. Wishing that, he and I could go back to the night before it all came crashing down. But, I dug myself in this situation. I had to lay in it for the time.

Maybe out relationship could be fixed. But not for now.

I sigh, flicking my computer on, putting those… _feelings_ , behind me. It’s not worth the headache anyways.

Not a half hour later, my phone rings with a call from Scott. I pick it up, holding it away as he screams my name in greeting.

“Hello to you, too, my friend.” I groaned, putting it back to my ear. He’s quiet, like he’s not sure of how to tread the water.

“So…” he finally says, breaking the quiet. “This is something, am I right? I thought you and Derek didn’t get along?” Here he goes again with that card.

“Scott, I told you,” I repeat myself for the hundredth time. “We were allies, still are, and we don’t hate each other. And this whole situation is surprising, I mean first Derek comes over and then-“

“He didn’t force you, did he?” Scott’s growl is surprising, and I nearly drop the phone. “Because if he did-“

“Easy, Scott. Down boy. He didn’t force anything on me. He just came over after he found out back in April, and then one thing led to the other and then… Here we are, in a roundabout sense.”  Scott’s heavy breathing was enough to know he was calming himself, and that was enough to calm _me_ down. “So, yeah. Don’t freak out, because I’m the only one who should be doing so.”

“Are you?” He asks.

“On the inside, sure. But I’m trying to keep it cool on the outside. Don’t want to be all spazzy on the outside.”

He thinks about this for a second, before switching topics. “Do you think I could be the godparent?” he asks, tone questioning.

I swallow bitterly, thinking about it for a second. “I don’t know. I might have to ask Derek before we decide on that.”

“Oh.” Disappointment replaces hope, and I feel guilty. But, given Scotts track record with Derek, I doubt he would be very happy if I just said “okay” just like that. “Well, anyways, I was just curious about how you were holding up, and-“

“You know I love you, right?” I say, filling in the void.

“Yeah, I do.” There’s a smile, I know. “I’m just really busy with the whole college thing, so I don’t have much time.” He reminded me of something else I had to do. “So I’ll talk to you later?”

“Absolutely. See you.” He hangs up, and I set the phone down. However, a few seconds later, it rings, Derek’s number lit up. Derek sounds breathless when I pick up. “Derek? Are you okay?”

“Stiles,” he grumbles into the phone, ignoring my greeting.

“What is it, Derek? Are you having sudden, bizarre cravings for chocolate dipped shellfish?”

“What? No. That’s disgusting. Why would I like shellfish? It’s about-“

“Say no more, I’m coming right now.” He growls, a soft sound that sounds like… a _moan?_   “Uh, Derek? What’s really going on?” I say, uncertainly.

“I, I’m…” he swallows, from what I guess. “I’m horny. And I need you to h…help me with it.”

I feel my face heat up, my grip on the phone tightening. “Um… w-what?” I splutter.

“I said I’m _horny._ ” He says, not stuttering as hard.

I swallow, hand shaking on the phone. “Do you… Do you want me to come over, or-“

“No.” He says, bluntly. He cusses, exhaling angrily. “I just mean, werewolves don’t mate when they are expecting kin…”

That bit of info shocked me. Before I start freaking out, I say “by ‘mate’ you mean have sex, right?”

“Yes” is all Derek says, in a _duh!_ tone.

“Alright.. Uh…” I fidget on my bed, not knowing what to do.

Wait a minute… _there’s_ an idea.

“Derek, I need you to listen to me, and do as I say, okay?” I force myself to have a steady tone, even though my heart is probably beating a mile a minute.

“What do you need, Stiles?” He groans.

“Take out your dick.”

He coughs. “W-what?”

“You heard me.” I replied back. “Take your dick out of your pants and hold it there.” I wait for a minute, the quiet sound of a zipper in the background. “Is it out yet?” I inquire.

“Yeah, it’s out.”

“Good. Is it hard yet?”

“It’s getting there, slowly.”

“Well, get it there quicker. And let me know when you’re fully hard.” I sit there for a full minute, watching my alarm clock to make sure. “Are you hard?” I ask.

“Yeah, Stiles.”

“Good. Now describe it for me.”

“Stiles.”

“Just _do it._ ”

He sighs, not answering for a second. “It’s hard.”

I laugh. “Tell me something I _don’t_ know already, Derek.”

“Shut up. It’s red… and leaking. And it’s swollen.”

“Where is it swollen, Derek?” I ask.

“Right around the base, like usual.”

“What, you mean like a knot? You actually have those?”

“Yes, Stiles.”

I put that bit of information away for later use, swallowing. “Alright, cool. Now I’m going to count to twenty, and each time I want you to stroke. No more, no less.”

“Stiles-“

“Count with me. One.” I say, palming myself through my jeans. He moans, and I smile. “That’s it. Two.” We continue this pattern, getting to thirteen before I stop. “Alright, now count to twenty out loud, on your own.” He whimpers, but I don’t hear much counting. “Or maybe I should hang up?” A breath gets sucked in.

That’s what I thought.

“Fourteen.” He whispers, keeps going until he reaches twenty, completely breathless.

“You sound pretty sensitive, Derek.” Is all I say, sitting up a little straighter.

“Y-yeah.” He stutters out, whimpering.

“Are you close?” I ask, and nod to myself when he affirms that. “Stroke yourself until I say so.” Derek does so, and despite him saying he’s sensitive, he goes for another couple of minutes.

“I’m close” he warns,

“Alright, stop now.” He makes a noise of disapproval, obviously not wanting to. “Now, suck a finger into your mouth and put it in your ass.”

He makes a choked noise, not responding until he makes a noise of an okay, and a few moments later, a keening sound fills the speaker. It’s almost too much; I have to remove my hand to not cream myself. I take a few shaky gulps of air, swallowing thickly. “Now imagine it’s my dick, instead of your fingers.”

“Might n-need to add another finger.” He whimpers out.  

“Do that.” I croak, air escaping me for a second. He keens again, at the second finger. “Now get yourself off with your fingers only. Don’t touch your dick again.”

“Stiles!” He keens, and I can imagine him now, writhing on the bed. The image brings a smirk to my face.

“Yeah, you like that Derek? Like having your fingers in your ass? Imagine what it would be like if we could do this again; if I could take my time, work over every inch of you; make it so you can’t even remember your own name. Just the feeling of me fucking into you.”

“Fuck, Stiles!” He cries, sounding incredibly close.

“It’s alright, Derek. You can cum now.” I say, and after a minute, he makes some sort of growl, before he’s coming

At least from what he’s whisper-moaning on the other line.

“Stiles,” he’s breathless, panting into the speaker, and I bite my lip to stop myself from making any guilty sound.

“Yeah, Derek. I’m here. I want you to do one more thing before we finish.”

“Anything.” He’s breathless again.

“Eat your cum.”

“Stiles.”

“C’mon. Please?”

“Fine, but only because you asked nicely.” I have to admit, the thought of him licking cum sloppy fingers clean makes me even _more_ uncomfortable. “Did you do it?” I moan, hands suddenly shaking.

“Yeah.”

“How did it taste?”

He coughs. “Like cum. Is there a taste to it?”

“I don’t know… Is it sweet? Salty? Bitter?”

“Stiles. Shut up. Tell me why you didn’t get off?”

“How did you know that?” I ask, and he chuckles.

“Because you just told me.”

Wow. That was _smooth._ “Oh, be quiet you jerk.”

“Mmm. You love it.” I imagine him rubbing his belly, a hand stroking his bump lovingly. The thought sent a thrill through me, and I wanted so badly to join him. “You should get some sleep.”

“Oh please, I’ve got more important things now to deal with than school.”

“You can’t get into college without a high school diploma. And besides, you also have that phone call with your college advisor as well.”

I pause. “Okay, wait, how did you know about-“

“Erica” is all he says, chuckling.

“What, is she some sort of spy for me or what?”

“When you’re the other father to a baby, you kind of take on the perks that come with it. Now I’m going to go wash off and get some sleep.”

“Fine, fine, fine, go wash off your juices. See you later.” The last bit falls on deaf ears. I get up to go to the shower to try to rid myself of this awkward situation.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this took so long to get out; this was difficult for me, and out of every scene i would write, this was the one I was happiest with. And plus, it's something alright~ Thanks for reading :)


	6. Chapter 6

The alarm clock wasn’t the thing that woke me up the next morning.

No, it wasn’t even Dad’s firm voice pulling me out of another dream. Which, when thinking about at a later time, was a good thing.

It was something else. Something warm, and… _wet._

“Mmmmmm _Derek,_ ” I mumble, still wrapped in the clutches of sleep. When my brain catches up with my mouth, it tells me to “wake up, did you actually _hear_ yourself?” my eyes flutter open slowly, taking in my surroundings, before looking down and seeing-

“D-Derek?!”

With his mouth on my dick, hand on my thigh, claws out. He shoots a glare towards me, holds up a finger to shush me, pointing towards the direction of my Dad’s room, before continuing on his merry way with what he was doing before.

“W-what are you doing?” I choke out, distracted by both his claws and his hollowed cheeks.

He doesn’t reply right away, like he’s thinking about an answer. He pulls off with a resounding _pop!_ Licking his lips, before looking at me. “You didn’t get off last night on the phone.”

I give him this look. “Wait, you can _hear that?_ ” I say in a hushed whisper. He nods, licking a stripe up the center of my cock. “Or, you could, you know, do _that,_ I guess.” It comes out more as a moan than anything. “B-but that can’t be the only reason you- _oh yeah, keep doing that-_ came here?” Again with the sucking. And the, the hollowed cheeks.

“I was horny when I woke up. Can’t control these changes, you know.” He doesn’t look completely put off on it, but it’s definitely a hindrance.

“Right. Hey, you aren’t going to start, you know, _breast feeding_ or anything, are you? Cause I mean, while that would be weird, it would be-“

“Stiles.” He says, pulling me back in.

“Right, sorry.” I run a hand through my hair. “Well, carry on I guess…”  I lay back, head hitting the pillow. Derek gives me a smile, running his claws up my leg in what I guess you could describe as “affectionate” before putting his mouth back on my dick.

I was surprised at how good Derek was at this, because the only real time he had this was with, uh… you know who. But, he knew what he was doing,

But then there was a finger grazing my hole, and, um, nope; that’ll hurt. A lot.

I flail a hand, trying to ward him off, grabbing the lotion out of my bedside drawer and tossing it at him. He catches it with ease, giving me a look, before squirting some on the hand that was wrapped around the base.

“oh, don’t talk with your mouthful” I grumble, and he makes a gagging sound from that. It makes me laugh, but then there’s a finger pressing in, and…

Well, I tense up. The whole shebang, really; clenching muscles, arched back, held breath. 

“Stiles, _breathe._ ” Derek’s rubbing a soothing hand over my stomach. “Let me in. Relax.” Well, I mean, how can you go wrong with that? “Better” he replies when the finger glides a little smoother, pushes in and out like a well-oiled machine, so much so that a second finger joined in next to it.

Derek abandoned my cock in favor of where his fingers were, and I was starting to miss his mouth a little bit, but between that and the now scissoring, I couldn’t choose. And then there was the _sounds_ he would make, the low rumblings in his chest, the occasional growl that slipped out, mixing in with my muffled, breathy whines of pleasure.

“One day I’m going to knot you,” he pushes his fingers in deeper, to the base knuckle, pushing in a third finger when he pulled out. “Fill you with my cock, my knot, until you can’t-fucking- _speak_ , anything other than my name.” His hand picked up, and the noises I made went up an octave. Maybe even two, but who’s checking?

“Gonna fill me with your cum, big guy? Oh _fuck._ ” I laughed, which morphed into a loud groan.

“Yeah, and you’ll love it.” He leans up, eyes bright red. “Then when the knot goes down, I won’t waste a bit. Not a drop.” His canines are starting to get dangerously long.

“You’ll eat y-your own cum?” I moan, hands fisting in my hair.

“Your damn right I will. And then I’ll kiss you, make you taste how good we taste together, and how. crazy. you. drive. me..” Each word is driven in with a thrust of his hand, a flick of his wrist, a curl of his fingers, driving me closer and closer to the edge.

“Fuck. You _fucker,_ touch me, make me cum.” He does a one up, and wraps his lips around my cock again. He times it so that each thrust of his hand pairs with him swallowing down, then back up again when his hand pulls back. Each time is a gagging sound, the feeling of my dick hitting the back of his throat.

The orgasm blindsides me, hits when Derek deep throats me that last time, hand snapping deep inside. I muffle the scream that comes with it in a pillow, hoping it was enough of a sound barrier. The hand gets pulled out _slowly_ , and the mouth gets removed, eliciting a shiver from me.

When I remove the pillow to look down at Derek, he’s smiling that fond smile at me. There’s a drop of cum on his lip, so I gesture him up so I can lick it off, kissing him deep right after that. I moan at the taste, of me and coffee and traces of peppermint toothpaste and bare hints of honey or something like that. His hand moves to my neck, holding me there, my hands moving to fist in his hair.

After a minute, he pulls away, looking both red mouthed and blissed out, smile easy and lazy. I return the smile, saying “you’re the man.” He laughs, wiping his hand on some discarded piece of clothing. When he stands, I move to return the favor, only to get the hand slapped away.

“No,” He answers, looking at me. “An orgasm for an orgasm. Now we’re even.”

A knowing smile spreads across my face, slowly. “Well, technically, you’re still down one orgasm, so I’ve got the upper hand?” I shrug, pulling up my boxers.

“What are you saying?” he asks, expression growing hungry. “You wanting to go for round two?”

“Uh, no.” I say, standing up. “I need a shower to think about just went down before I’d be ready for another round.” My eyes travel from his face to his stomach, which, now that I have a better look at it, is getting _big._ Like, bigger than what I think would be usual for a single pregnancy. “By the way, Jesus dude, you are starting to really show. You’re what, eleven weeks?” He stiffens, like I said something wrong.

Wait, did I violate some sort of pregnancy code? What?

“Yeah, I guess.” He’s not angry. I exhale in relief, and he smiles, kisses my temple. “Go to school. “I’ll see you later.” After a minute he jumps out of the window. I freak out, leaning out the window.

“Hey, that’s dangerous!” I shout at nobody in particular, knowing very well that he heard me.

Or at least I think.

* * *

“Dude, you _reek_ of Derek. Did you two have sex or something?” Scott is, yet again, complaining about that. I roll my eyes, pushing whatever kind of meat that is supposed to be around my plate.

“Uh, yeah, Scott. Me and Derek have to get as much time in before the kid is born, because we won’t get much time after. Don’t you know how that works?” I give him a smirk, returning to my plate.

“Yeah, well it’s really distracting, is all.” He replies, with no bite.

I laugh. “Yeah, well your over-obsessing of Allison is distracting to me as well. Which, speaking of that, she’s looking over at us _again._ ” I jerk my head over to her table, where she’s stealing more and more glances our way. Yes, directed more to me than Scott, but still, to our _general area._

“Well, yeah. But she’s been doing that for a while.”

I raise an eyebrow at him. “Or ever since me and Derek started _doing it._ ”

“I don’t want to hear about it.” He grimaces, hiding his face. I start dancing my eyebrows, laughing. Suddenly there is a tray set down to my left, and I look up to see Lydia setting her stuff down.

“Can I help you?” I ask, giving her a surprised look.

She scoffs, flipping a strawberry blonde lock over her shoulder. “I am not sitting alone. It’s embarrassing. I mean, maybe I am a screamer, or whatever, but that doesn’t make me any different. Does it?” I shake my head when she looks inquiring and she smirks, finding something funny. “Besides, if people wanted to k now if I was a screamer, they should have just asked Jackson.”

Scott proceeds to spew milk all over his tray. I fall out of my chair trying to contain my laughter.

* * *

There was a tapping on the window. I made a motion that it was open, not taking my eyes off of the homepage for a hospital.

“Stiles,” he says, moving to stand behind my chair as best as he could.

“Hey, Derek,” I mutter, reading “we offer a quality, well  open to _all patients_.”

“What are you looking at?” He inquires, breath ghosting right behind my ear. I press down on the urge to shiver, focusing on the paragraph.

“Just, uh, this hospital. We’re coming up on thirteen weeks, so maybe we should plan on an ultrasound soon?” Derek isn’t moving, not even his then easy breathing in my ear. “Derek?” I ask, looking back at his reserved face.

“I just thought, we would go to Deaton.” The tone _might_ have held some Alpha authority, but I kept pushing.

“Well, yeah, that was a choice, and the smartest, but read here; it says right there ‘open to all patients.’ So, you know, I don’t think they’d turn away someone like-“

“I don’t think you understand, Stiles.” He’s slowly getting agitated, if the posture and eyes are anything to go by. “Because, I really doubt that I would fall under ‘all patients.’ Because, last time you checked, I’m not-“

“A girl, I know! You don’t think I can _see that?_ ” I’m seething just as much from his closed-mindedness.

“Then why the stubborn quality? What’s so special about this hospital in particular?” He says it in a condescending manner, a step too close for comfort.

I avert my eyes, head tilted down. “It’s just, that’s where my mom gave birth to me…” All the fight drained out of Derek then, taking a step back, eyes back to their green-grey-hazel color.

“Stiles, I… I didn’t know.” He moves to touch me, but doesn’t at the last second. “I’m sorry.”

My laugh is just a touch bitter. “No, you couldn’t have known. No need to apologize.” I sit down, run a hand through my hair. “It’s fine. We’ll go to Deaton like we should. No need to worry about it.”

“Stiles,” he begins, but I wave him off.

“I uh, have some homework I need to do. Think you can leave me alone for a while?” I turn back to my computer, not waiting for a visual confirmation. Derek goes out the same way he came in, but not without trailing a hand along my neck and one of my shoulders.

_I didn’t even get to tell him about college,_ I think bitterly.

* * *

“Hey, uh, Dad?” I say, walking into where he’s sitting with a case file. He glances up at me for a second, before returning to his folder. His raised eyebrow is enough of a question. “I wanted to, uh, tell you about something.”

Still silence, save for the rustling of papers. Right.

“I decided on doing online college for a place near here, instead of moving to New York like I planned.” He looks up, surprised, but a bit of anger there.

“And when were you planning on telling me about New York?” He questions, face tense like whenever I would lie to him before. I swallow, wringing my hands.

“I, I don’t know.”

He laughs, tiredly, but still angered. “You mean like you and werewolves? Were you not going to tell me like that?” When I don’t answer, he scoffs, shaking his head, ignoring me completely.

“Sorry,” I mumble, eyes cast down. I stand there awkwardly, not sure of how I want to keep it going.

He looks up, agitated. “Was there something else, or were you done?”

“No, well, yes, I mean-Dad, I just…” I can’t find the words. “Dad, I just-“

“Son,” He says, exhaling, pinching the bridge of his nose. “I’m sorry I acted that way.” He stands. “I know you want things back the way they were, but… I’m just not quite ready to forgive you for all of this.” He mostly brings attention to the scars that were accumulated on his torso, under his shirt, which stung. “Maybe one day we can, but it’s not today.” He gathers his file, moves past me, hand on my shoulder to move past me, his door closing a second later.

I exhale, sitting at the table, tears sitting at the cusp of  I take the whiskey that was left over, draining it, trying to get a feeling other than the overwhelming guilt that was sitting in my gut.

Maybe this is what he felt every night for all those years after mom passed away. 

**Author's Note:**

> Hey, you made it! I hope you enjoyed it (cause I did.) The chapters will probably be shorter after this one, and I may switch to Derek POV. Don't worry, if I DO switch to someone else's POV, I'll let you know beforehand ^^
> 
> Okay, I'll stop rambling so you can go about your day~ Thanks for taking the time to read my stuff~


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